My book, Help Me! A Psychotherapist’s Tried-and-True Techniques for a Happier Relationship with Yourself and the People You Love, published in 2016 by Health Psychology Press, remains a popular entry in the self-help literature.
I am always interested to discover which of the seventy essays seem to have the greatest impact and to what extent those selections match my own beliefs about their value and importance. For me, there is one that stands out because of its implications for healthy growth and change; the essence of good psychotherapy. The essay I refer to is “Problem or Condition.”
In the essay, I state the following, “…it is more helpful to treat anxiety or depression as a problem, not a condition. A problem, by definition, needs to be solved and, therefore, stimulates action. People tend to become more involved in their therapy when they believe that with help, they can do something about their situation. Seeing one’s situation as a condition might invite passivity that could undermine the motivation necessary to make desired changes.”
Comments from patients like, “well, that’s just the way I am,” “nothing I can do about that,” or “I’ve been this way so long, I’m sure I can’t change,” often lead to feelings of resignation and defeat. When these beliefs are challenged or reconsidered, a productive therapeutic effort leading to meaningful change is more likely to occur.
Psychologist and researcher at Stanford University, Carol S. Dweck, argues that one’s mindset can determine the course of much of one’s life. She writes, “you learn one of two mindsets from your parents, teachers, and coaches: that personal qualities such as intelligence and ability are innate and unchangeable (the fixed mindset) or that you and others can change and grow (the growth mindset). Understanding and adjusting your mindset can change your career, relationships… and your overall satisfaction in life.”
Hans Schroder, a postdoctoral research fellow in the department of psychiatry at the University of Michigan, has applied the concepts of fixed and growth mindsets to the study of how people cope with anxiety, which can certainly be applied to handling depressive episodes. This, essentially, is the same as my distinction between problem and condition. Schroder says, “We’ve found that people with a fixed mindset towards anxiety tend to see it as a fundamental part of who they are (i.e. condition) whereas those with a growth mindset tend to see it as a temporary albeit unpleasant emotion that they can cope with (i.e. a problem) that may or may not require action on their part.
People who have a growth mindset and, therefore, believe that anxiety or depression can change, are more likely to tolerate uncomfortable feelings and challenge their thinking in order to feel better. Those with a fixed mindset, who might be inclined to believe that anxiety and depression are more permanent, tend to resort to emotional avoidance or, worse, resort to unhelpful coping strategies like alcohol and drugs in order to get by.
Psychotherapy is likely to be a more effective endeavor when someone is actively engaged in the process, believing that change, where possible, is the objective, and that even difficult and chronic emotional states can be aggressively challenged and improved.
