He had informed both women that he was seeing someone else besides them and had been positively handling the occasional complications or conflicts of dating more than one person at a time. While enjoying some of the clear benefits of having two dating options, George was seriously interested in clarifying his interests and intentions and having a full relationship with one of them as soon as possible.
Neal, a 48 year old physician, was having quite a different experience. Neal was in the fourth year of his divorce from a woman to whom he had been married for twenty-five years. He, like George, was dating two women, but, unlike George, was feeling conflicted and guilty and having difficulty enjoying his time with either woman, seemingly because of the very existence of the other and his nagging belief that somehow or other "I'm doing something wrong!" by dating two women at the same time.
Having these two men as clients in my practice at the same time afforded an opportunity to learn something about the ways different people handle the experience of dating, especially when there are multiple partners. Several interesting and challenging issues emerged as the work with both of these men progressed.